Well pleas'd I've seen that self-same hen,
That scratch'd forone, would scratch for ten;
These are the thoughts that make me willing,
To take my'.
Jane without a shilling,
And for the self-same cause, d'ye see,
Jane is resolv'd to marry me.
A VORTHY cit, von Vitsunday
Vith vife rode out in von-horse chay,
And down the streets as they did trot,
Says Mrs. Vite, "I'll tell you vot,
Dear Villiam Vite, 'tis my delight,
Ven our veek's bills ve stick 'em, That, side by side, ve thus shou'd ride . To Vindsor or Vest Vickham."
My loving vife, full vell you know,
Ve used to ride to Valthamstow,
But now I thinks it much the best
That ve should ride tovards the vest.
If you agree, dear vife, vith me,
And vish to change the scene,
Then, ven the dust excites our thirst,
Ve'll stop at Valtham-green."
"Vell, then," says Mrs. Vite, says she,
"Vat pleases you must sure please me,
But veekly vorkings must all go
If ve this day go cheerful through,
For vell I loves the voods and groves,
They raptures put me in ;
For you know, Vite, von Vit-sun night,
You did my poor heart vin.'
Then Mrs. Vite, she took the vip,
And vacked poor Dobbin on the hip,
Vhich made him from a valk run fast,
And reach the long-vished sign at last.
Lo, ven they stopt, out vaiter popt,
"Vat vould you vish to take?"
Says Vite, vith a grin," I'll take some gin,
My vife takes vine and cake.”
Ven Mrs. Vite had took her vine,
To Vindsor on they vent to dine.
Ven dinner o'er, Mr. Vite did talk,
My darling vife ve'll take a valk;
The path is vide by the vater side,
So ve vill valk together;
Vile they get tea for you
and me,
Ve vill enjoy the veather."
Some vanton Eton boys there vere,
Vich marked for vaggery this pair;
Mrs. Vite cried out "vat are they arter?"
Ven they popp'd poor Vite into the vater.
The vicked vits then left the cits,
Ven Vite the vaves sunk under,
She vept, she squalled, she vailed, she bawled, "Vill not none help, I vonder."
Her vimpering vords assistance brought,
And vith a boat-hook Vite they sought;
Ven she, vith expectation big,
Thought Vite vas found, but 'twas his vig.
Vite was not found, for he was drowned;
To stop her grief each bid her ;
"Ah! no," she cried, " I vas a bride,
But now I is a vidder."
Air" Bow, wow, wow.”
THIS world is like a baker's shop,
In which are many cakes, sirs,
And oftentimes a curious one
Will Madam Nature make, sirs.
In great repute they've long been held,
For truly it is said, sirs,
Wer't not for cakes, how many men
Must go without their bread, sirs.
The ladies sweet are sugar cakes,
And often prove a prize cake:
Coquets are cold as frosty cakes,
And don't deserve a bride cake;
Now dandy lads, with stays and pads,
Dressed out like simple tonies,
Cannot be reckoned cakes at all,
They are only maccaronies.
A poor man is a plain cake,
A proud man is a puff, sirs,
A poet is a seedy cake,
That's always poor enough sirs;
A rich man's a plum cake,
A true friend is a heart cake;
And if a man be six feet high,
He can't be called a short cake.
An old maid is a lemon cake,
A bachelor's a stale cake,
A lawyer is a spunge cake,
His client is a pale cake;
A sailor is a spicy cake,
Who's known from pole to pole, sirs,
And if the sea were Chancery,
He'd be Master of the Roll, sirs.
You may think me a droll cake,
But happy I shall be, sirs,
If when amongst you here I come,
I suit you to a T, sirs.
I have only now one more to add,
And that shall be a sound cake,
May you never want a slice
Of William's golden pound cake.
DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND.
A LAWYER, quite famous for making a bill,
And who in good living delighted,
To dinner, one day, with a hearty good will,
Was by a rich client invited!
But he charged 6s. 8d. for going to dine,
Which the client he paid, tho' no ninny;
And in turn charg'd the lawyer for dinner & wine,
One a crown, and the other a guinea !
But gossips you know, have a saying in store,
He who matches a lawyer has only one more.
The lawyer he paid it, and took a receipt,
While the client star'd at him with wonder;
But gave to his friends, with the produce, a treat,
Tho' the lawyer soon made him knock under ?
That his client sold wine, information he laid,
Without license; and, in spite of his storming,
The client a good thumping penalty paid,
And the lawyer got half for informing!
But gossips you know, have a saying in store
He who matches a lawyer has only one more.
DARK was the night, and dreary was the scene,
When Julia sat to count the lonely hours,
Hours, that with Henry, happy might have been,
But Henry's love for play subdued love's pow'rs!
Dear was his wife, his children too were dear,
But dearer the dice, by which he was undone ;
His tender mate was left no partner but a tear,
She anxiously expected him-the clock struck one.
In life's bright morn when all around was gay,
When pleasure smil'd and sorrow was unknown,
With glad consent he led his bride away,
That lovely bride whose heart was all his own:
A beauteous offspring, now her care implor'd,
A drooping husband wanted comfort too,
How could he leave an object so ador'd
To watch the tedious night—the clock struck two.
Loud blew the wind, and fast the torrent fell,
Vainly to calm disquietude she strove→→
Hark! steps advance-he sounds the portal bell,
She ran—she flew-to welcome home her love;
Awhile his presence cheer'd-alas ! how short!
He paus'd-he sigh'd; then started from the door
She follow'd-but to hear the dread report-
A pistol clos'd the scene-the clock struck four.
FROWN On, false world, thy malice meets but scorn,
Thy treach'rous smile no more shall cheat my heart;
Thy power may crush the hapless wretch forlorn,
But friendship bids from me thy ills depart.
Though poverty's sad darkening clouds o'ercast
The op'ning prospects of hopes flattering dream,
Not biting penury itself can blast
My joy, when cherish'd by unchanged esteem.
What though no riches swell my coffered board,
No jewels bright from eastern regions sought,
I boast of greater treasures-gifts adored,
The precious wealth of valued hearts unbought.
Then hence false world, thy terrors are no more,
Thy smile or frown alike I mark unmoved;
Thy tyrant reign o'er this torn heart is o'er,
And all its joys shall rest on- -friends beloved.
CAHOME-DEAR LOVE, AND THEE!
Ar morn I left my happy home,
In yon secluded bay;
My bark shot o'er the lake's clear tide,
And dash'd aside the spray :
I sought the vale where sweetly blooms
The blushing op'ning rose:
I roam'd amid the sunny haunts,
Where the fleet wild-deer repose
But sunny haunt, and happy scene,
Had no sweet charm for me,
My thoughts-my heart-my hopes were turn'd
To Home-Dear Love, and Thee!
At night I stood amid the halls,
Where Pleasure casts her spell,
And listen'd to the sweetest words,
That ruby lips could tell,
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