my glory." Here the sufferings of Christ, and his tasting death for every man, and the travels, sufferings, and martyrdoms of the apostles, and primitive christians, in labouring for the conversion of the gentiles, were livingly revived in me; and according to the measure of strength afforded, I laboured in some tenderness of spirit, being deeply affected among them. The difference between the present treatment which these gentiles, the negroes, receive at our hands, and the labours of the primitive christians for the conversion of the gentiles, were pressed home, and the power of truth came over us; under a feeling of which, my mind was united to a tender-hearted people in these parts. The meeting concluded in a sense of God's goodness towards his humble, dependent children.

The next day was a general meeting for worship, much crowded, in which I was deeply engaged in inward cries to the Lord for help, that I might stand wholly resigned, and move only as He might be pleased to lead me. I was mercifully helped to labour honestly and fervently among them, in which I found inward peace; and the sincere were comforted. From this place I turned towards Pipe Creek, and the Red Lands, and had several meetings among friends in those parts. My heart was often tenderly affected, under a sense of the Lord's goodness in sanctifying my troubles and exercises, turning them to my comfort, and I believe to the benefit of many others; for I may say with thankfulness, that in this visit, it appeared like a tendering visitation in most places.

I passed on to the western quarterly meeting in Pennsylvania. During the several days of this meeting, I was mercifully preserved in an inward feeling after the mind of truth, and my public labours tended to my humiliation, with which I was content. After the quarterly meeting for worship

ended, I felt drawings to go to the women's meeting for business, which was very full: here the humility of Jesus Christ, as a pattern for us to walk by, was livingly opened before me; and in treating on it my heart was enlarged, and it was a baptizing time. I was afterwards at meetings at Concord, Middletown, Providence, and Haddonfield, whence I returned home, and found my family well. A sense of the Lord's merciful preservation in this my journey, excites reverent thankfulness to Him.

2nd of 9th mo. 1768. With the unity of friends, I set off on a visit to friends in the upper part of Berks and Philadelphia counties; was at eleven meetings in about two weeks, and have renewed cause to bow in reverence before the Lord, who, by the powerful extendings of his humbling goodness, opened my way among friends, and I trust made the meetings profitable to us. The following winter I joined. some friends in a family visit to some part of our meeting, in which exercise, the pure influence of Divine love, made our visits reviving.

5th of 5th mo. 1768. I left home under the humbling hand of the Lord, with a certificate to visit some meetings in Maryland; and to proceed without a horse seemed clearest to me. I was at the quarterly meetings at Philadelphia and Concord; whence I proceeded to Chester River; and crossing the bay, was at the yearly meeting at West River; I then returned to Chester River, and taking a few meetings in my way, proceeded home. It was a journey of much inward waiting; and as my eye was to the Lord, way was several times opened to my humbling admiration, when things appeared very difficult. On my return, I felt a very comfortable relief of mind; having, through Divine help, laboured in much plainness, both with friends selected, and in the more public meetings; so that I trust the pure witness in many minds was reached.

11th. of 6th. mo. 1769.

There have been sundry cases

of late years, within the limits of our monthly meeting, respecting the exercising of pure righteousness towards the negroes, in which I have lived under a labour of heart, that equity might be steadily preserved. On this account I have had some close exercises among friends, in which, I may thankfully say, I find peace. And as my meditations have been on universal love, my own conduct in time past became of late very grievous to me. As persons setting negroes free in our province, are bound by law to maintain them, in case they have need of relief; some in the time of my youth, who scrupled to keep slaves for term of life, were wont to detain their young negroes in their service without wages, till they were thirty years of age. With this custom I so far agreed, that being joined with another friend, in executing the will of a deceased friend, I once sold a negro lad till he might attain the age of thirty years, and applied the money to the use of the estate.

With abasement of heart I may now say, that sometimes as I have sat in a meeting, with my heart exercised towards that awful Being, who respecteth not persons nor colours, and have thought upon this lad, I have felt that all was not clear in my mind respecting him; and as I have attended to this exercise, and fervently sought the Lord, it hath appeared to me that I should make some restitution, but in what way I saw not till lately: when being under some concern that I might be resigned to go on a visit to some part of the West Indies; and under close engagement of spirit seeking to the Lord for counsel herein, the aforesaid transaction came heavily upon me, and my mind, for a time, was covered with darkness and sorrow. Under this sore affliction, my heart was softened to receive instruction: and I now first perceived, that as I had been one of the two executors, who had sold this lad for

nine years longer than is common for our own children to serve, so I should now offer part of my substance to redeem the last half of the nine years; but as the time was not yet come, I executed a bond, binding myself and my executors, to pay to the man to whom he was sold, what to candid men might appear equitable, for the last four and a half years of his time, in case the said youth should be living, and in a condition likely to provide comfortably for himself.

9th of 10th mo. My heart hath often been deeply afflicted under a feeling, that the standard of pure righteousness is not lifted up to the people by us, as a society, in that clearness which it might have been, had we been as faithful as we ought to be to the teachings of Christ. And as my mind hath been inward to the Lord, the purity of Christ's government hath been opened to my understanding; and I have believed, in the opening of universal love, that where a people who are convinced of the truth of the inward teachings of Christ, are active in putting laws in execution, which are not consistent with pure wisdom, it hath a necessary tendency to bring dimness over their minds. My heart having been thus exercised for several years, with a tender sympathy towards my fellow members, I have within a few months past. expressed my concern on this subject, in several meetings. for discipline.

CHAP. X.

1769-1770.

Bodily indisposition.-Exercise of his mind for the good of the people in the West Indies.-Communicates to friends his concern to visit some of those islands.-Preparations to embark.-Considerations on the trade to the West Indies.-Release from his concern and return home.-Religious engagements.-Sickness and exercise of his mind

therein.

12th of 3rd mo. 1769. Having for some years past dieted myself on account of a lump gathering on my nose, under which I grew weak in body, and was not of ability to travel by land as heretofore; I was at times favoured to look with awfulness towards the Lord, before whom are all my ways, who alone hath the power of life and death; and to feel thankfulness raised in me for this his fatherly chastisement, believing, that if I was truly humbled under it, all would work for good. While under this bodily weakness, my mind was at times exercised for my fellow-creatures in the West Indies, and I grew jealous over myself, lest the disagreeableness of the prospect should hinder me from obediently attending thereto; for though I knew not that the Lord required me to go there, yet I believed that resignation was now called for in that respect. Feeling a danger of not being wholly devoted to him, I was frequently engaged to watch unto prayer, that I might be preserved; and upwards of a year having passed, as I one day walked in a solitary wood, my mind being covered with awfulness, cries were raised in me to my merciful Father, that He would graciously keep me in faithfulness; and it then settled on my mind, as a duty, to open my condition to friends at our monthly meeting; which I did soon after as follows:

An exercise hath attended me for some time past, and of