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} Away, away.
conscience; he makes restitution. As I am a true Quick. With tri:l-fire touch me his finger-end spirit, welcome!
[Noise within. If he be chaste, the flame will back descend, Mrs. Page. Alas! what noise ?
And turn him to no pain ; but if he start, Mrs. Ford. Heaven forgive our sins !
It is the flesh of a corrupted heart. Fal. What should this be?
Pist. A trial, corne. Mrs. Ford.
Come, will this wood take fire. Mfrs. Page. [ They run off
( They burn him with their lupers. Fal. I think, the devil will not have me damned, Fnl. Oh, o!, oh! lest the oil that is in me should set hell on fire; he Quick. Corrupt, corrupt, and tainted in desire! would never else cross me thus.
About him, fiuiries; sing a scornful rhyme; Enter Sir Hugh Evans, like a satyr ; Mrs. Quickly, And, as you trip, still pinch him to your time. and Pistol; Anne Pace, as the Fairy Queen, and iniquity.
Eva. It is right; indeed he is full of lecheries attended by her brother and others, dressed like fairies, with waren tapers on their heads.
SONG. Quick. Fairies, black, grey, green, and white,
Fye on sinful fantasy! You moon-shine revellers, and shades of night,
Fye on lust and luxury ! You orphan-heirs of fixed destiny,
Lust is but a bloody fire, Attend your office, and your quality.
Kindled with unchaste desire, Crier Hobgoblin, make the fairy o-yes.
Fed in heart; whose flames aspire, Pist. Elves, list your names; silence, you airy As thoughts do blow them, higher and higher. toys.
Pinch him, fairies, mutually; Cricket, to Windsor chimnies shalt thou leap :
Pinch him for his villainy ; Where fires thou find'st unrak'd, and hearths un- Pinch him, and burn him, and turn him aboul, swept,
Till candles, and star-light, and moon-shine be oul. There pinch the maids as blue as bilberry : During this song, the fairies pinch Falstaff. Doctor Our radiant queen hates sluts and sluttery.
Caius comes one way, and steals away a fairy in Fal. They are fairies; he, that speaks to them, green ; Slender another way, and takes off a fairy shall die :
in white ; and Fenton comes, and steals away
Mrs. I'll wink and couch : no man their works must eye.
Anne Page. A noise of hunting is made within. [Lies down upon his face. All the fairies run away.
Falstaff pulls of his Eva. Where's Pede ? - Go you, and where you buck's head, and rises.
find a maid, That, ere she sleep, has thrice her prayers said,
Enter Page, Ford, Mrs. Page, and Mrs. Ford. Raise up the organs of her fantasy,
They lay hold on him. Sleep she as sound as careless infancy ;
Page. Nay, do not fly; I think, we have watch'd But those as sleep, and think not on their sins,
you now : Pinch them, arms, legs, backs, shoulders, sides, and will none but Herne the hunter serve your turn shins.
Mrs. Page. I pray you, come; hold up the jest Quick. About, about ;
no higher: Search Windsor-castle, elves, within and out : Now, good sir John, how like you Windsor wives? Strew good luck, ouphes, on every sacred room ; See you these, husband ? do not these fair yokes That it may stand till the perpetual doom,
Become the forest better than the town? In state as wholesome, as in state 'tis fit;
Ford. Now, sir, who's a cuckold now? - Master Worthy the owner, and the owner it.
Brook, Falstaff's a knave, a cuckoldly knave; here The several chairs of order look you scour
are his horns, master Brook: And, master Brook, With juice of balm, and every precious flower : he hath enjoyed nothing of Ford's but his buckEach fair instalment, coat, and several crest, basket, his cudgel, and twenty pounds of money ; With loyal blazon, evermore be blest !
which must be paid to master Brook ; his horses And nightly, meadow-fairies, look, you sing, are arrested for it, master Brook. Like to the Garter's compass, in a ring :
Mrs. Ford. Sir John, we have had ill luck; we The expressure that it bears, green let it be,
could never meet. I will never take you for my More fertile-fresh than all the field to see ;
love again, but I will always count you my deer. And, Hony soit qua mal y pense, write,
Fal. I do begin to perceive that I am made an In emerald tufts, flowers purple, blue, and white : Like sapphire, pearl, and rich embroidery, Ford. Ay, and an ox too ; both the proofs are Buckled below fair knight-hood's bending knee:
extant. Fairies use flowers for their charactery.
Fal. And these are not fairies? I was three or Away; disperse: But, till ’tis one o'clock, four times in the thought, they were not fairies : and Our dance of custom, round about the oak
yet the guiltiness of my mind, the sudden surprize Of Herne the hunter, let us not forget.
of my powers, drove the grossness of the foppery Eva. Pray you, lock hand in hand; yourselves into a received belief, in despite of the teeth of all in order set: rhyme and reason, that they were fairies.
See now, And twenty glow-worms shall our lanterns be, how wit may be made a Jack-a-lent, when 'tis upon To guide our measure round about the tree. ill employment. But, stay: I smell a man of middle earth.
Eva. Sir John Falstaff, serve Got, and leave your Fal. Heavens defend me from that Welch fairy! desires, and fairies will not pinse you. lest he transform me to a piece of cheese!
F'ord. Well said, fairy Hugh. Pist. Vile worm, thou wast o'erlook'd even in Eva. And leave you your jealousies too, I pray thy birth.
Ford. I will nerer mistrust my wife again, till Page. Why, this is your own folly. Did not I thou art able to woo her in good English.
tell you, how you should know my daughter by her Fal. Have I laid my brain in the sun, and dried garments ? it, that it wants matter to prevent so gross o'er- Slen. I went to her in white, and cry'd mum, reaching as this ? Am I ridden with a Welch goat and she cry'd budget, as Anne and I had appointed; too ? Shall I have a coxcomb of frize? 'Tis time I and yet it was not Anne, but a post-master's boy. were choked with a piece of toasted cheese.
Eva. Jeshu! Master Slender, cannot you see but Eva. Seese is not good to give putter ; your pelly marry boys? is all putter.
Page. O, I am vexed at heart : What shall I do? Fal. Seese and putter! have I lived to stand at Mrs. Page. Good George, be not angry: I knew the taunt of one that makes fritters of English ? of your purpose; turned my daughter into green; This is enough to be the decay of lust and late- and, indeed, she is now with the doctor at the walking, through the realm.
deanery, and there married. Mrs. Page. Why, sir John, do you think, though we would have thrust virtue out of our hearts by the
Enter Caius. head and shoulders, and have given ourselves without scruple to hell, that ever the devil could have cozened; I ha' married un garçon, a boy ; un pai
Caius. Vere is mistress Page? By gar, I am made you our delight? Ford. What, a hodge-pudding ? a bag of flax ?
san, by gar, a boy; it is not Anne Page : by gar, I Mrs. Page. A puffed man?
am cozened. Page. Old, cold, withered, and of intolerable
Mrs. Page. Why, did you take her in green? entrails?
Caius. Ay, be gar, and 'tis a boy: be gar, I'll
raise all Windsor. Ford. And one that is as slanderous as Satan?
[Exit Caius. Page. And as poor as Job ?
Ford. This is strange : Who hath got the right
Page. My heart misgives me: Here comes mas
ter Fenton. and sack, and wine, and metheglins, and to drinkings, and swearings, and starings, pribbles and
Enter Fenton and ANNE PAGE. prabbles ?
Fal. Well, I am your theme: you have the start How now, master Fenton ? of me; I am dejected; I am not able to answer Anne. Pardon, good father! good my mother, the Welch fannel : ignorance itself is a plummet
pardon! o'er me; use me as you will.
Page. Now, mistress ? how chance you went not Ford. Marry, sir, we'll bring you to Windsor, to with master Slender ? one master Brook, that you have cozened of money, Mrs. Page. Why went you not with master docto whom you should have been a pander : over and
tor, maid? above that you have suffered, I think, to repay that Fent. You do amaze her: Hear the truth of it, . money will be a biting affliction.
You would have married her most shamefully, Mrs. Ford. Nay, husband, let that go to make Where there was no proportion held in love. amends :
The truth is, she and I, long since contracted Forgive that sum, and so we'll all be friends. Are now so sure, that nothing can dissolve us. Ford. Well, here's my hand; all's forgiven at The offence is holy, that she hath committed : last.
And this deceit loses the name of craft, Page. Yet be cheerful, knight : thou shalt eat a Of disobedience, or unduteous title ; posset to-night at my house; where I will desire Since therein she doth evitate and shun thee to laugh at my wife, that now laughs at thee : A thousand irreligious cursed hours, Tell her, master Slender hath married her daughter. Which forced marriage would have brought upon Mrs. Page. Doctors doubt that : if Anne Page
her. be my daughter, she is, by this, doctor Caius' wife. Ford. Stand not amaz’d: here is no remedy:
[Aside. In love, the heavens themselves do guide the state ; Enter SLENDER.
Money buys lands, and wives are sold by fate.
Fal. I am glad, though you have ta'en a special Slen. Whoo, ho! ho! father Page !
stand to strike at me, that your arrow hath glanced. Page. Son! how now ? how now, son? have you Page. Well, what remedy ? Fenton, heaven give despatched ?
thee joy! Slen. Despatched ! — I'll make the best in Glo- | What cannot be eschew'd, must be embrac'd. cestershire know on’t; would I were hanged, la, else. Fal. When night-dogs run, all sorts of deer are Page. Of what, son ?
chas'd. Slen. I came yonder at Eton to marry mistress Eva. I will dance and eat plums at your wedding. Anne Page, and she's a great lubberly boy; If it Mrs. Page. Well, I will muse no further : had not been i' the church, I would have swinged
Master Fenton, him, or he should have swinged me. If I did not Heaven give you many, many merry days !. think it had been Anne Page, would I might never Good husband, let us every one go home, stir, and 'tis a post-master's boy.
And laugh this sport o'er by a country fire; Page. Upon my life then you took the wrong. Sir John and all.
Slen. What need you tell me that ? I think so, Ford. Let it be so:- Sir John, when I took a boy for a girl : If I had been mar- To master Brook you yet shall hold your word; ried to him, for all he was in woman's apparel, 1 For he, to-night, shall lie with mistress Ford. would not have had him.
WHAT YOU WILL.
Ozsixo, Duke of Illyria.
servants to Oliviz. SEBASTIAN, a young gentleman, brother to Viola.
Clown, ANTONIO, a sea captain, friend to Sebastian. 4 sea captain, friend to Viola.
Olivia, a rich Countess. VALENTINE,
Viola, in love with the Duke.
Maria, Olivia's woman.
Lords, Priests, Sailors, Officers, Musicie..., 2! MALYOLIO, steward to Olivia.
other Attendants. SCENE, · A City in IllyRIA; and the Sea-coast near it.
} gentlemen attending on the Duke.
SCENE I. – An Apartment in the Duke's Palace.
Duke. If musick be the food of love, play on,
Cur. Will you go hunt, my lord ?
What, Curio ?
How now? what neu's
Duke. O, she, that hath a heart of that fine frame,
SCENE 11.-- The Sea-coast,
Enler Viola, Captain, and Sailors.
My brother he is in Elysium.
SCENE III. - A Room in Olivia's House.
Enter Sir Toby Belch, and Maria.
the death of her brother thus? I am sure, care's an
enerny io liíc. Cap. True, madam : and, to comfort you with Mar. By my troth, sır Toby, you must come in chance,
earlier o'nights; your cousin, my lady, takes great Assure yourself, after our ship did split,
exceptions to your ill hours.
the modest limits of order.
than I am : these clothes are good enough to drink Where, like Arion on the dolphin's back,
in, and so be these boots too ; an they be not, let I saw him hold acquaintance with the waves, them hang themselves in their own straps. So long as I could see.
Mar. That quafting and drinking will undo you: Vio.
For saying so, there's gold: I heard my lady talk of it yesterday; and of a foolish Mine own escape unfoldeth to my hope,
knight, that you brought in one night here, to be Whereto thy speech serves for authority,
her wooer. The like of him. Know'st thou this country?
Sir To. Who ? Sir Andrew Ague-check ? Cap. Ay, madam, well; for I was bred and Mar. Ay, he. born,
Sir To. He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria. Not three hours' travel from this very place.
Mar. What's that to the purpose ? Vio. Who governs here?
Sir To. Why, he has three thousand ducats a year. Caz.
A noble duke, in nature, Mar. Ay, but he'll have but a year in all these As in his name,
ducats ; he's a very fool, and a prodigal. Vis. W'hat is his name?
Sir To. Tye, that you'll say so! he plays o' the Cap.
Orsino. viol-de-gambo, and speaks three or four languages Vin. Orsino! I have heard my father name him : word for word without book, and hath all the good He was a bachelor then.
gifts of nature. Cap. And so is now,
Mar. He hath, indeed, almost natural : for, Or was so very late : for but a month
besides that he's a fool, he's a great quarreller; and, Ago I went from hence; and then 'twas fresh but that he hath the gift of a coward to allay the In murmur, (as, you know, what great ones do, gust he hath in quarrelling, 'tis thought among the The less will prattle of,) that he did seek
prudent, he would quickly have the gift of a grave. The love of fair Olivia.
Sir To. By this hand, they are scoundrels, and
substractors, that say so of him. Who are they?
Sir To. With drinking healths to my niece; I'll In the protection of his son, her brother,
drink to her, as long as there is a passage in my Who shortly also died : for whose dear love, throat, and drink in Illyria : He's a coward, and a They say, she hath abjur'd the company
coystril, that will not drink to my niece, till his And sight of men.
brains turn o' the toe like a parish-top. What, Vio.
O, that I served that lady: wench? Castiliano-vulgo; for here comes Sir Anand miglit not be delivered to the world,
drew Ague-face. Till I had made mine own occasion mellow, What my estate is.
Enter Sir ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK. Сар.
That were hard to compass; Sir A. Sir Toby Belch! how now, sir Toby Belch? Because she will admit no kind of suit,
Sir To. Sweet sir Andrew ?
Sir And. Bless you, fair shrew.
Sir To. Accost, sir Andrew, accost.
Sir And. What's that ? I will believe, thou hast a mind that suits
Sir To. My niece's chamber-maid. With this thy fair and outward character.
Sir And Good mistress Accost, I desire better I pray thee, and I'll pay thee bounteously,
acquaintance. Conceal me what I am; and be my aid
Mar. My name is Mary, sir. For such disguise as, haply, shall become
Sir And. Good mistress Mary Accost,
Sir To. You mistake, knight: accost, is, front her,
board her, woo her, assail her. It may be worth thy pains; for I can sing,
Sir And. By my troth, I would not undertake her And speak to him in many sorts of inusick, in this company. Is that the meaning of accost? That will allow me very worth his service.
Mar. Fare you well, gentlemen. What else may hap, to time I will commit;
Sir 70. An thou let part so, sir Andrew, 'wouli Only shape thou thy silence to my wit.
thou might'st never draw sword again. Cap. Be you his eunuch, and your mute I'll be ; Sir And. An you part so, mistress, I would I When my tongue olabs, then let mine eyes not see! might never draw sword again. Fair lady, do you
Vin, I thank thee: Lead ine on. (Ereunt. think you have fools in hand ?
Dlar. Sir, I have not you by the hand.
well in a flame-coloured stock. Shall we set abou: St And. Viarry, but you shall have; and here's some revels ?
Sir To. What shall we do else? were we not born Har. Now, sir, thought is free: I pray you, bring under Taurus? your hand to the buttery-bar, and let it drink.
Sir And. Taurus ? that's sides and heart. Sir And. Wherefore, sweet heart? what's your Sir To. No, sir; it is legs and thighis. Let me metaphor?
caper : ha! higher: ha, ha! excellent! Jar. It's dry, sir.
[Exeunt. Sir And. Why, I think so; I am not such an ass, but I can keep my hand dry. But what's your jest? SCENE IV. - A Room in the Duke's Palace.
Mar. A dry jest, sir.
Enter ValENTINE, and Viola in man's attire. Mar. Ay, sir; I have them at my fingers' ends : Val. If the duke continue these favours towards marry, now I let go your hand, I am barren. you, Cesario, you are like to be much advanced; he
[Erit MARIA. hath known you but three days, and already you are Sir To. O knight, thou lack'st a cup of canary : no stranger. When did I see thee so put down ?
Vio. You either fear his humour, or my negliSir And. Never in your life, I think ; unless you gence, that you call in question the continuance a' see canary put me down: Methinks sometimes I his love: Is he inconstant, sir, in his favours? have no more wit than a Christian, or an ordinary Val. No, believe me. man has : but I am a great eater of beef, and, I believe, that does harm to my wit.
Enter DUKE, Curio, and Attendants. Sir To. No question.
Vio. I thank you.
Here comes the count. Sir And. An I thought that, I'd forswear it. I'll Duke. Who saw Cesario, ho? ride home to-morrow, sir Toby.
Vio. On your attendance, my lord; here. Sir To. Pourquoy, my dear knight?
Duke. Stand you awhile aloof. · Cesario, Sir And. What is pourquoy? do or not do? I Thou know'st no less but all; I have unclasp'd would I had bestowed that time in the tongues, that To thee the book even of my secret soul : I have in fencing, dancing, and bear-baiting: 0, Therefore, good youth, address thy gait unto her; had I but followed the arts !
Be not deny'd access, stand at her doors, Sir To. Then hadst thou had an excellent head of And tell them, there thy fixed foot shall grow, hair.
Till thou have audience. Sir And. Why, would that have mended my hair? Vio.
Sure, my noble lord, Sir To. Past question ; for thou seest, it will not
If she be so abandon'd to her sorrow curl by nature.
As it is spoke, she never will admit me. Sir And. But it becomes me well enough, does't Duke. Be clamorous, and leap all civil bounds, not?
Rather than make unprofited return. Sir To. Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff; Vio. Say, I do speak with her, my lord: What then? and I hope to see a housewife take thee between her Duke. O, then unfold the passion of my love, legs, and spin it off.
Surprise her with discourse of my dear faith : Sir And. 'Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby: It shall become thee well to act my wocs; your niece will not be seen; or, if she be, it's four She will attend it better in thy youth, to one she'll none of me: the count himself, here Than in a nuncio of more grave aspéct. hard by, wooes her.
Vio. I think not so, my lord. Sir To. She'll none o'the count; she'll not match
Dear lad, believe it; above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I For they shall yet belie thy happy years, have heard hier swear it. Tut, there's life in't, man. That say, thou art a man: Diana's lip
Sir And. I'll stay a month longer. I am a fellow Is not more smooth, and rubious; thy small pipe o' the strangest mind i' the world; I delight in Is as the maiden's organ, shrill, and sound, masques and revels sometimes altogether.
And all is semblative a woman's part. Sir To. Art thou good at these kick-shaws, knight? I know, thy constellation is right apt
Sir And. As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, For this aflair: - Some four, or five, attend him ; under the degree of my betters; and yet I will not All, if you will; for I myself am best, compare with an old man.
When least in company: – Prosper well in this, Sir To. What is thy excellence in a galliard, k night? Vio.
I'll do my best, Sir And. 'Faith, I can cut a caper.
To call his fortunes thine. Sir To. And I can cut the mutton to't
And thou shalt live as freely as thy lord, Sir And. And, I think, I have the back-trick, To woo your lady : yet, [Aside. ] a barful strife ! simply as strong as any man in Illyria.
Whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wife. Sir To. Wherefore are these things hid ? where
[Exeunt. fore have these gifts a curtain before them? are they like to take dust, like mistress Mall's picture? why SCENE V.- A Room in Olivia's House. dost thou not go to church in a galliard, and come
Enter Maria and Clown. home in a coranto? My very walk should be a jig ; I would not so much as make water, but in a sink- Mar. Nay, either tell me where thou hast been, -pace. What dost thou mean? is it a world to hide or I will not open my lips, so wide as a bristle may virtues in? I did think, by the excellent constitution enter, in way of thy excuse : my lady will hang thee of thy leg, it was formed under the star of a gal- for thy absence. Jardi.
Clo. Let her hang me: lic, that is well hanged in Sir And. Ay, ‘uis strong, and it does indifferent this world, needs to fear no colours.