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"Ainsi que ses chagrins l'Hymen a ses plaisirs: Quelle joie en effet, quelle douceur extrême,

De se voir caresser d'une épouse qu'on aime !"-BOILEAU.

"If I've luck, sir,

She's my uxor,

O! dies benedictorum!"-Agreeable Surprise.

"Sine Cerere et Baccho friget Venus."

“Marriage is evidently the dictate of Nature; men and women were made to be the companions of each other; and, therefore, I cannot be persuaded but that marriage is one of the means of happiness."-Rasselas.

נחית דרגא נסיב איתתא סק דרגא בחר שושבינא:

"Go down the ladder when thou marriest a wife; go up when thou choosest a friend."


MARRIAGE, under any circumstances, is a very ticklish affair.

When the contracting parties do not "hit their horses," they frequently hit each other, and then it is a most disagreeable affair.

When they do harmonize, and one is the echo-the veritable reflection-of the other's thoughts, smiles, and feelings, anticipating every whim and desire, it is a very pleasant affair.

When a "happy couple " display their affection by pats and taps, and little pinches before company, it is a very ridiculous affair.

When the husband throws out aggravating insinuations, and the excited spouse, like Xantippe of old, throws a tea-pot at her lord and master's head, it is a horrible affair.

When the lady rules the roast, and wears the inexpressible look of tyrannical command, and the gentleman tacitly yields to her usurping and unnatural sway, it is a pitiable affair.

When the husband is not content with the sweets of the flower he has culled, but flies abroad, and, like the "little busy bee," goes sipping and "gathering honey" from "every opening flower," it is a lament

able affair.

When the lady, forgetful of her vows of constancy and love, "bolts" with a pair of black whiskers, and ditto military boots, it is a very naughty affair.

Taking all these reflections into consideration, it must incontestably appear that marriage is a very serious affair. And, as marriages are said to be made in heaven, we should advise every candidate not to tie the knot before he obtains a duly authenticated certificate of the original contract!


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THE science of boxing is peculiarly English, and would appear to have an influence even upon the softer sex; for, no sooner does a suitor "show fight," than the lady and her relatives simultaneously demand “a ring! a ring!" Mercy on the poor fellow who engages with his fair antagonist!

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If, blinded by passion, he rushes heedlessly to the encounter, he may run a risk of getting his head “in Chancery," or his "nob may suffer from the fair one's dexterity in "fibbing," or his "bread-basket" may be punished, and, elegant and accomplished though she be, he will find that even the best bred is not unleavened!

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"DID you ever see! exclaims the tender-hearted Susan Maydew. "Well, I declare, B is the very perfection of husbands."

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"Dear, delightful creature!" echoes her friend Elizabeth; "he is as full of spirits as gallantry. What delicate attentions he lavishes upon his wife! Truly now, courtship appears to have come after, instead of before marriage."

"Happy woman!" continues Susan Maydew, (a spinster, by the bye, as well as her sympathising friend!) "I do verily believe, if she could eat gold, he would procure it for her!"

And then, having exhausted all their eloquent admiration, they each conclude with a sigh, which may be easily interpreted in the words of Shakespeare, or Shakspeare,

"She would that heaven had made her such a man!"


How deceitful are appearances! How profound the hypocrisy of man! B- the admired, the "loved of all the ladies" for his "delicate attentions " to his better-half abroad, is a veritable bashaw in his own house, a tyrannical task-master, and his envied rib the trembling slave of his unreasonable whims and caprices, who dare not look a contradiction to his behests. So,

"Sigh no more, ladies,

Men mere deceivers ever."

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