After some plans proposed by each, Lord Chateaubriand made a speech, (Quoting, to show what men's rights are, Or rather what men's rights should be, From Hobbes, Lord Castlereagh, the Tsar, And other friends to Liberty,) Wherein he having first protested 'Gainst humoring the mob - suggested (As the most high-bred plan he saw For giving the new War éclat) A grand, Baptismal Melo-drame, To be got up at Notre Dame, In which the Duke (who, bless his Highness! Had by his hilt acquired such fame, 'T was hoped that he as little shyness Would show, when to the point he came,) Should, for his deeds so lion-hearted, Some of his own famed Jordan (Marie Louise not having quite Used all that, for young Nap, he brought her,) The baptism, in this case, to be Which Bourbon heroes most expose; Or if (the Viscount said) this scheme 1 Brought from the river Jordan by M. Chateaubriand, and presented to the French Empress for the christening of young Napoleon. 2 See the Duke's celebrated letter to madame, written during his campaign in 1815, in which he says, "J'ai le postérieur légèrement endommage." Which, if at Paris got up well, They have, says BRUCE (and BRUCE From the strict truth), a Grand Quadrille And, he assures us, the grimaces, "Now (said the Viscount), there's but few "Great Empires where this plan would do: "For instance, England;- let them take "What pains they would - 't were vain to strive "The twelve stiff Judges there would make "The worst Quadrille-set now alive. "One must have seen them, ere one could Had, when, with many a pious prayer, he Bequeathed unto the Virgin Mary His marriage deeds, and cordon bleu,1 Bequeathed to her his State Wig too (An offering which, at Court, 't is thought, The Virgin values as she ought) — Of sixty barbers daily sat,2 A smile at t'other, and 't was done! 2 The learned author of Recherches Historiques sur les Perruques says that the Board consisted but of Forty- the same number as the Academy. "Le plus beau tems des perruques fut celui où Louis XIV. commença à porter, luimême, perruque; ... On ignore l'époque où se fit cette révolution; mais on sait qu'elle engagea Louis le Grand à y donner ses soins paternels, en créant, en 1656, quarante charges de perruquiers, suivant la cour; et en 1673, il forma un corps de deux cents perruquiers pour la Ville de Paris." - P. III. "New frizzed! alas, 't is but too true, "Well may you start at that word new — "But such the sacrifice, my friends, "The Imperial Cossack recommends; "Thinking such small concessions sage, "To meet the spirit of the age, "And do what best that spirit flatters, "In Wigs-if not in weightier matters. "Wherefore to please the Tsar, and show "That we too, much-wronged Bourbons, know "What liberalism in Monarchs is, "We have conceded the New Friz! "Thus armed, ye gallant Ultras, say, "Can men, can Frenchmen, fear the fray? "With this proud relic in our van, "And D'ANGOULÊME our worthy THE FUDGE FAMILY IN PARIS. Le Leggi della Maschera richiedono che una persona mascherata non sia salutata per nome da uno che la conosce malgrado il suo travestimento. CASTIGLIONE. PREFACE. IN what manner the following Epistles came into my hands, it is not necessary for the public to know. It will be seen by Mr. FUDGE'S Second Letter, that he is one of those gentlemen whose Secret Services in Ireland, under the mild ministry of my Lord CASTLEREAGH, have been so amply and gratefully remunerated. Like his friend and associate, THOMAS Reynolds, Esq., he had retired upon the reward of his honest industry; but has lately been induced to appear again in active life, and superintend the training of that Delatorian Cohort, which Lord SIDMOUTH, in his wisdom and benevolence, has organized. Whether Mr. FUDGE, himself, has yet made any discoveries, does not appear from the following pages. But much may be expected from a person of his zeal and sagacity, and, indeed, to him, Lord SIDMOUTH, and the Greenland-bound ships, the eyes of all lovers of discoveries are now most anxiously directed. I regret much that I have been obliged to omit Mr. BOB FUDGE's Third Letter, concluding the adventures of his Day with the Dinner, Opera, etc.; — but, in consequence of some remarks upon Marinette's thin drapery, which, it was thought, might give offence to certain well-meaning persons, the manuscript was sent back to Paris for his revision and had not returned when the last sheet was put to press. It will not, I hope, be thought presumptuous, if I take this opportunity of complaining of a very serious injustice I have suffered from the public. Dr. KING wrote a treatise to prove that BENTLEY" was not the author of his own book," and a similar absurdity has been asserted of me, in almost all the best-informed literary circles. With the name of the real author staring them in the face, they have yet persisted in attributing my works to other people; and the fame of the "Twopenny Post-Bag such as it is — having hovered doubtfully over various persons, has at last settled upon the head of a certain little gentleman, who wears it, I understand, as complacently as if it actually belonged to him; without even the honesty of avowing, with his own favorite author, (he will excuse the pun) ἐγὼ δ ̓ Ο ΜΩΡΟΣ ἀρὰς I can only add, that if any lady or gentleman, curious in such matters, will take the trouble of calling at my lodgings, 245 Piccadilly, I shall have the honor of assuring them, in propriâ persona, that I am — his, or her, April 17, 1818. Very obedient and very humble Servant, THOMAS BROWN, THE YOUNGER. You remember how sheepish BOB lookt at Kilrandy, But, Lord! he 's quite altered. they 've made him a Dandy; A thing, you know, whiskered, greatcoated, and laced, Like an hour-glass, exceedingly small in the waist: Quite a new sort of creatures, unknown yet to scholars, With heads so immovably stuck in shirtcollars, That seats, like our music-stools, soon must be found them, To twirl, when the creatures may wish to look round them. In short, dear, "a Dandy" describes As to Pa, what d 'ye think? — mind, it's all entre nous, But you know, love, I never keep secrets from you Why, he 's writing a book—what! a tale? a romance? No, ye Gods, would it were! but his Travels in France; At the special desire (he let out t 'other day) Of his great friend and patron, my Lord CASTLEREAGH, Who said, "My dear FUDGE " I forget the exact words, And, it's strange, no one ever remembers my Lord's; But 't was something to say that, as all must allow A good orthodox work is much wanting just now, To expound to the world the new-thingummie - science, Found out by the- - what's-its-name And prove to mankind that their rights are but folly, Their freedom a joke (which it is, you know, DOLLY), "There's none," said his Lordship, "if I may be judge, Half so fit for this great undertaking as FUDGE!" |