I was warm and earneft; the fetting forth of thy glory; the afferting of thy Truth; the detection and conviction of errors; the clearing of the innocent; the aggravating of fins, oppreffions and deceits: and though I was careful that I did not exceed the bounds of truth, or due moderation, yet I ever thought that thefe were the feafons for which that talent was given me, and accordingly I employed it.

14. Touchig my BODY and BODILY ENDOWMENTS of HEALTH, STRENGTH and BEAUTY.

1. In general: I looked upon my Body but as an inftrument, the vehiculum anime, and not fo much given for its own fake, as to be an engine for the exercife of my foul, and a cottage, wherein it might inhabit and perfect itself; and upon that reason I was very careful to keep it useful for that end; and that as on the one fide, by over-much feverity or tyranny over it, I might not tire it; fo on the other fide, by overs much pampering or pleafing it, might not make it un-, ruly and mafterlefs, though I held the latter far more dangerous For,

2. I confidered and found that my body was the harbour of the most dangerous temptations, and the receptacle of the moft dangerous enemies to my foul. The greateft, and moft intimate, and moft affiduous temptations, for the moft part made their applications to my body, and held correfpondence with the lufts and inclinations of my flesh and blood; the wine, when it gave its colour in the cup, and the pleasantnefs of it, variety and curiofity of meats, beautiful and fleshly allurements, coftly and exceffive apparel, precedence and honour, wealth and power, the purveyor of all provifions convenient for the fufficing of fleshly defires, opportunities of revenging, fenfe of injuries, eafe, idlenefs and delicacy; thefe and a thoufand more made their applications and addreffes to my fenfual and corporal appetite; the motions of my blood, the con

A vehicle of the soul.

ftitution

ftitution or complexion of my body, the lufts and defires of my flesh, or rather this luft reached and hunted: after them, whereby my body, which was given to be instrumental and fubfervient unto my foul, was ready ftill to caft off the yoke, and fet up for itself, and proftitute that noble part to be a servant, a bawd unto it, and bring her to that fervitude and vaffalage, that all her wit, fkill, activity, and power, was wholly taken up in contriving and making provifions for the flefh. I found that the fenfual and beaftly part, was ready ftillto thrust the heavenly and intellectual part out of her throne, and to ufurp it, and to invert the very order of nature itself; fo that both the parts of my com-' pofition were difordered, and out of their place, and loft their ufe. My body, which was given to ferve and obey, became the emprefs, and commanded and cor-. rupted my foul, embafed and enslaved it to luft and diforder; and my foul, which was given to rule, became. but the minister and flave of my body, and was tainted and emafculated by the empire and dominion of my, body, and the lufts and fteams of concupifcence that did arife from it; and I confidered that if the business was thus carried, my happinefs was only in this life. When fickness, or difeafes, or death should seize upon. my body, I had an immortal foul. that had loft her, time wholly in this world; and not only fo, but was; embased and putrified by thefe noifome lufts; and that, the very contagion of my body was incorporated and diffused through my foul, and could carry nothing with her but immortality and disappointment, and defilement, and confequently could expect, to all eternity, nothing but vexation and diffatisfaction, and everlasting confufion. Upon all thefe confiderations, I refolved. and practifed feverity over this unruly beaft, brought. my body into fubjection, refused to gratify her intemperate defires, denied them, kept them in awe and under difcipline; and becaufe I found that my flefhly lufts grew petulant, imperious and unruly, by variety, curiosity and plenty of meats, drinks, and by eafe and idlenefs,

3

idlenefs, I fubdued them by moderate diet and tempe rance, by hard labour and diligence, till I had reduced my body to that state and order that became it, that it might be in fubjection, and not in dominion; might ferve and not rule. I denied fatisfaction to an interperate appetite, a wanton eye, a vain wish, a worldly defire. My table was fparing to myself, my cloaths plain, my retinue and attendance but neceffary. I chafed away my luft, with the contemplations of the prefence of God, the end of Chrift's fufferings, the certainty, yet uncertainty of death; the ftate after death; and mingled all my enjoyments and defires with these ferious and cleanfing confiderations; and I peremptorily refused to gratify the cravings of an importunate, inordinate, fenfual appetite; and did refolutely let them know, they fhould not, might not expect any better dealing from me, and my practice was accordingly.

3. I found by evident experience, that it is the great eft difficulty that can be, for a man in a good condition to give himself leave to think it may be otherwise. There is a vanity that accompanies Health, that we can scarce perfuade ourselves that we shall ever be fick or die: We cannot put on another estimate of our condition than we do at prefent enjoy, especially if it be pleasing and delightful. To wean myfelf from this impotency of mind, although it hath pleased thee to give me a ftrong and healthy conftitution, yet I often put myfelf into the imagination and fuppofition of fickness, thoughts of my mortality, abftracted myself from my prefent condition of life and health, and pre-apprehended sickness, diseases, old age, infirmity and death ; and by this means broke and fcattered my confidence of long life, continued health, and took up thoughts becoming a fick, infirm, or dying man: confidered how my accounts ftood, if God fhould pleafe to call me away, how I could alienate my mind from the world; what patience I had to bear pain and weaknefs, and fickness, in my moft entire and firmest

health,

health, it was my care fo to order my life and actions, as if the next hour might defpoil me of my life and health too; I did not, durft not allow myself in any confiderate practice of any known fin, in procraftination of my repentance, in a toleration of paffions, upon a fuppofition of a continuance of life, or of an unfhaken health; but ftill caft with myself, would I do thus, were the firmness of my health, or the thread of my life to be broken off the next hour; my firm and ftrong conftitution made me neither proud nor prefumptuous, but the frequent interpofitions of the thoughts of my change kept me humble and watchful.

4. In reference to my health, I always avoided thefe two extremes. I never made it my idol, I declined not the due employment of my body in the works of charity or neceffity, or my ordinary calling, out of a vain fear of injuring my health; for I reckoned my health given me in order to these employments; and as he is over curious that will not put on his cloaths for fear of wearing them out, or ufe his ax in his proper employment, for fear of hurting it; fo he gives but an ill account of a healthy body, that durft not employ it in an employment proper for him, for fear of hurting his health. 2. I was never vainly prodigal of it, but careful in a due manner to preferve it; I would decline places of infection, if I had no neceffary calling that brought me to them; unneceffary journies, expofing my body gratis to unneceffary dangers, efpecially intemperance in eating and drinking.

5. I esteemed Strength and Beauty, and comeliness of body thy bleffing, an invitation to thankfulness; I esteemed it to carry with it a fecret admonition to bear a proportionable mind and life, to a comely or beautiful body; and I looked upon a beautiful countenance, as a juft reprehenfion of a deformed or ugly life or difpofition; but I never found in it matter of pride or vain-glory. 1. Because it is thy gift, and not my own acquifition. 2. Because a small matter quite fpoils it; a fall, or a disease spoils the greateft ftrength; a hu

mour

mour in the face, a rheum in the eye, a palfy, or thé fmall-pox, ruins the greatest beauty; or if none of thefe happen, yet either old age, or death, turns all into weakness, deformity, or rottennefs. I learn therefore in the enjoyments of thefe bleffings, to enjoy them with humility and thankfulnefs; in the lofs of them, to lose them with patience and contentednefs; for I acknowledge thy hand both in the gift and in the lofs. I looked upon them as flowers of the fpring, pleafing to the eye, but of fhort continuance; the cafualty of an unruly wind, an unfeafonable froft, a worm or fly might intercept their natural courfe of continuance; but they that escaped beft, an autumn or winter will infallibly overtake and deftroy them. 15. Concerning my WEALTH and temporal fubfiftence..

1. I efteemed these acquifitions rather the effects of thy providence and bleffing, than of my power or induftry; for if inftrumentally my induftry acquired them, yet that very induftry is thy gift; it is thou that givet me power to get wealth. Again, 2. Though my induftry and dexterity to get wealth, were never fo great, yet a fmall interpofition either of thy providence or permiffion might foon difappoint and fruftrate all that dexterity or induftry: a thief, or a storm, or a fire, or a leak, or the difcompofure of the times, or a prodigal wife or fon, or an unfaithful fervant, or a long ficknets, or a misfortune in others whom I trust, or a flaw in a title, or a word mifinterpreted, or a thousand other emergencies may in a little space ruin the product of many years labour and care. When I have looked upon a fpider framing his web with a great deal of curiofity and care, and after his industry of many days, the maid with the broom, at one brush, fpoils all; or when I have feen a republic of pismires with great circumfpection choofing the feat of their refidence, and every one carrying his egg and provifions to their common ftore-houfe, and the boy with a flick flirring it all abroad, or a hen or partridge feat

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