DIARY CONTINUED. I'll not complain,-it must be best And when I tread the vale of death, 67 "1840, March 2nd. Yesterday, I again sat down with the dear people of God, to commemorate the dying love of Jesus: precious season! -but O, what reason have I to lament the deceitfulness of my heart, my inactivity in the cause of God, and indifference for the honour of his name. Heavenly Father, quicken me in thy way! "1840, May 29th. This affliction has been sent to do me good. The Lord has dealt graciously with me. My thoughts, I trust, have been heavenward; I have enjoyed a peace of mind such as the world cannot give. It is good for me that I have been afflicted, O Lord, that I might learn thy statutes. Here I must expect tribulation. In heaven there is neither sorrow nor sighing. None of its inhabitants say, I am sick; for the former things are passed away. What an animating thought. O blessed Saviour, may I daily feed upon thee by faith in my heart, with thanksgiving, till I see thee in the heavenly paradise, and taste, through eternal ages, the sweetness of redeeming love.' On another visit, finding her much prostrated in strength, the bible lying on the bed, the superintendent remarked "I hope that you now find 68 THE FAITHFULNESS OF GOD. the promises in that book precious and sweet to your mind." After quoting several which he thought might be consolatory in her circumstances, she replied, "Yes, and they are true. I will never leave nor forsake thee.' It is all true Sir, even in my experience-God never has left me. -I may have left him for a season, but he bore with me. He has supported and cheered me amidst all my troubles, and I can truly say He is a faithful covenant-keeping God.' My regrets are that I do not love him as I ought; and that I cannot maintain such ardent attachment to the Saviour as his love demands." Wishful further to test her convictions as to the faithfulness of the Divine Being, her friend observed "there are times when we are apt to think that 'God hath forgotten to be gracious, and that his mercies are clean gone for ever;"" adding, "perhaps such seasons may be permitted to try our faith; or there may be moments of weakness, wherein some are tempted to doubt whether religion is not altogether a delusion, and the scheme of mercy a beautiful fiction." Fixing her eyes with a keen penetrating glance, as if about to reproach him for the latter suggestion, but observing some anxiety betrayed to know the thoughts which were passing through her mind, she instantly became calm, and placing her hand within his, 66 THE DESTITUTION OF THE UNGODLY. 6 69 said, "O Sir, I am sure that the Almighty is faithful to all his promises. You know that he has declared When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee; when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. For I am the Lord thy God, the Holy One of Israel.' If He loves, he loves for ever. His kindness is constant and unchanging like himself. There may have been seasons of momentary gloom in my religious experience, but I cannot recall the time, since I became fully devoted to his service, when I could doubt his friendship and favour towards me." At a subsequent visit, "on entering the room," be observes "I saw that a decided change for the worse had taken place: she, too, was conscious of it. After some inquiries relative to her health, she began the conversation by saying 'I have just been remarking to my aunt, that I cannot tell what I should have done now if I had religion to seek. O what do you think the poor creatures feel at such a time as this, when destitute of an interest in Christ? I do not see what grounds of comfort are left to them. Besides, they have all the most important work to do, but have not strength nor time to do it. How thankful I ought to be that mine is a different lot to theirs. Yet I do F 70 THE LAST INTERVIEW. not deserve more than they;' then, with a faltering voice, often interrupted by exhaustion from want of breath, she added, 'I often repeat these words, "Why was I made to hear thy voice, And enter while there's room, While thousands make a wretched choice, On asking if she was fully resigned to the will Mary's strength was rapidly failing when the last interview took place. The ruddy cheek and bright sparkling eyes, which often betoken health, were in strange contrast to her attenuated delicate form; whilst the feeble pulse, difficult respiration, and THE DISCIPLINE OF GOD. 71 parched lips, indicated the ravages which disease had made upon her constitution. Yet cheerful, and with a look that told her feelings better than words, she welcomed his visit by holding out both hands; for she was too weak to speak, except in faint whispers. On saying, You are very poorly to-day, she remarked, "I am; but what I suffer is nothing to that which my Saviour endured for me." Is He still precious? "Yes, dearer than ever." Do you find him faithful to help in time of need? "O yes; and he will not at last leave me in trouble to sink." Are you happy in the prospect of entering into another world? "I am, because I have a humble hope of standing before Him, accepted through the merits of Christ." Then we shall meet again there? to this she replied, "And never part again." On saying that there was often an appearance of mystery which might never be understood on earth, in reference to some parts of the discipline and government of God; especially in his allowing afflictions to harass his children prior to their removal hence; but that probably, he intended first to wean their hearts by gentle means from the love of life, that they might be fixed supremely on himself and eternal realities; and secondly, that those around us may see the worth of pure religion, and be induced to seek it for themselves. Catching the idea last presented, and applying |