expect to be remunerated for any little service they may render us. Various are the duties which I have been called to fulfil during the last three months. Besides seeking a precarious living for my family, I have been obliged to act as nurse to my dear wife, who was unable to raise herself in her bed. I began to be so accustomed to sit up at night watching by her bed side, that I had become almost a stranger to sleep. At length, fearing that my own health and strength would give way, I reluctantly yielded to the advice of a friend, and engaged a nurse to attend to my wife: yet I could not wholly resign my charge, for I found such persons to be mere hirelings, more intent upon their own interest than the discharge of their duty. Expenses had increased in a way which filled me with alarm. The long illness of my wife, previous to her approaching confinement, was truly distressing. I saw that I had no help but in my God; but truly he is a very present help in trouble. I hardly dared to think of my circumstances, they were almost enough to stagger my faith. I could only look upward and trust. At length, on the 8th of November, 1837, my poor wife gave birth to a seventh child, a daughter, our first girl. A few hours subsequent to this event, she was attacked with a violent inflammation, so that the application of twenty leeches, besides a blister and bleeding with a lancet, were found necessary to preserve life. This violent prostration of the little strength that she had, appeared, in all human probability, likely to prove fatal; but the Lord graciously averted this calamity, for, although her sufferings were intense, the chief Physician mercifully healed her. She is now gradually recovering, though it will be a considerable time before she can take an active part in her household concerns. Thanks be to the Lord for having graciously brought her thus far, and for having supplied my need at such a trying time; for through your kind exertions I received country orders for Tea, which was a great help to me in my distress. Some kind and christian ladies in Devonshire were prompted to aid me, by sending orders for Tea, accompanied with an assurance that they came "with the love of the brethren;" and thus I was graciously enabled to support my family through the medium of my business. I thank God that he permits me to depend upon him for spiritual as well as temporal supplies, who has so often appeared in my behalf when at my greatest extremity. Oh, that I may at all times put my whole trust and confidence in Him! May he mercifully pardon my weakness and unbelief, when, through the pressure of heavy trial, my heart has been ready to faint within me. I know there is no reason for giving way to lamentation and despondency. We are encouraged to go to our Father with hearts full of grief, and to tell him all our troubles-to keep nothing back, but to pour all our complaints into his merciful ear, and to cast our burden and care upon him. Oh it is sweet to rely with confidence on the faithfulness of a reconciled Father in Christ Jesus. He gives with the heart of a parent, and when He visits us with affliction, it is not for His pleasure but for our profit, even that we may be made partakers of his holiness. And what a ground of confidence have we in drawing near to God, when we remember the merit of the Atonement and the character of our great High Priest. Here is a way of access ever open. As the Jewish mercy seat was the medium of mercy, so I rejoice in having found Jesus to be the great Mediator through whom God draws nigh unto us, and we unto Him. May I ever trust to the precious blood of Emmanuel. However unworthy I am, he is worthy to receive all glory and blessing. My prayers are very poor, but his intercession is ever powerful and will prevail. May my heart meditate more and more on the gracious character of God-on the work and intercession of Christ, and on the entire work of the Spirit in converting, in sanctifying and teaching the soul, and gradually unfolding to it the glories of the Cross of Christ! May I have grace to say with the Apostle, "Most gladly, therefore, will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me!" "I will praise the Lord with my whole heart in the assembly of the upright, and in the congregation. The works of the Lord are great, sought of all them that have pleasure therein. He hath given meat to them that fear him. He will ever be mindful of his covenant. Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time forth for evermore!" 7, Southampton Street, Euston Square, December, 1837. |