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COMPLAISANCE. There are many arts of graciousness and conciliation which are to be practised without expence, and by which those may be made our friends, who have never received from us any real benefit. Such arts, when they include neither guilt nor meanness, it is surely reasonable to learn ; for who would want that love which is so easily to be gained?
. Rambler, vol. 2, p. 16. The universal axiom in which all complaisance is included, and from which flow all the formalities which custom has established in civilized nations, is, “ That no man should give any preference to himself;" a rule so comprehensive and certain, that perhaps it is not easy for the mind, to imagine an incivility without supposing it to be broken.
Ibid p. 262.
There are, indeed, in every place, some particular modes of the ceremonial part of good breeding, which being arbitrary and accidental, can be learned only by habitude and conversa- ' tion. Such are the forms of salutation, the different gradations of reverence, and all the adjustments of place and precedence. These, however, may be often violated without offence, if it be sufficiently evident that neither malice nor pride contributed to the failure, but will not atone, however rigidly observed, for the tumour of insolence, or petulance of contempt.
Itid. Wisdom and virtue are by on means sufficient, without the supplemental law of good breed
ing, to secure freedom from degenerating into rudeness, or self-esteem from swelling into insolence. A thousand incivilities may be committed, and a thousand offices neglected, without any remorse of conscience, or reproach from. reason.
Ibid. p. 261.
If we would have the 'kindness of others, we must endure their follies. He who cannot persuade himself to withdraw from society, must be content to pay a tribute of his time to a multitude of tyrants : To the loiterer, who makes ap-pointments which he never keeps; to the con-sulter, who asks advice which he never takes; to the boaster, who błnsters only to be praised ; to the complainer, who whines only to be pitied; to the projector, whose happiness is to entertain his friends with expectations, which all but himself know to be vain ; or to the economist, who tells of bargains and settlements; to the politician, who predicts the fate of battles and breach of alliances ; to the usurer, who compares the different funds; and to the talker, who talks only because he loves to be talking.
Idler, vol. I, p. 80: SELF-COMPLACENCY. He that is pleased with himself easily imagines. · he shall please others.
Life of Pope. CHARITY. Charity would lose its name were it influenced by so mean a motive as human praise.
Introduction to the Proceedings of the Committee for clothing French Prisoners, p. 158.
To do the best can seldom be the lot of man it is sufficient if, when opportunities are presented, he is ready to do good. How little virtue: could be practised if beneficence were to wait always for the most proper objects, and the noblest occasions;--occasions that may never hap pen, and objects that may never be found!
Ibid, p. 1594 That Charity is best of which the consequences are most extensive.
Ibid. Of Charity it is supersuous to observe, that it could have no place if there were no want; for of a virtue which could not be practised, the omission could not be culpable. Evił is not only the occasional, but the efficient; cause of charity. We are incited to the relief of misery by the consciousness that we trave the same nature with the sufferer ;, that we are in danger of the same distresses; and may some time implore the same assistance.
Idler, vol. 2, p. 2090
CHARITY TO CAPTIVES. The relief of enemies has a tendency to unite mankind in fraternal affection, to soften the acrimony of adverse 'nations, and dispose them to peace and amity. In the mean time it alleviates captivity, and takes away something from the miseries of war. The rage of war, however mitigated, will always fill the world with calamity and horror. Let it not then be unnecessarily extended: let animosity and hoga tility cease together, and no man be longer
deemed an enemy than while his sword is drawn against us.
Introduction to the Proceedings of the Committee
for Clothing French Prisoners, p. 159.
CENSURE. Censure is 'willingly indulged, because it always implies some superiority. Men please themselves with imagining that they have made a deeper search, or wider survey than others, and detected faults and follies which escape vulgar observation.
Rambler, vol. 1, p. 7.. Those who raise envy will easily incur censure.
Idler, vol. 1, p. 78.
- Established custom is not easily broken, till soine great event shakes the whole system of things, and life seems to re-commence upon new principles. .
Western Islands, p. 18. • Custom is commonly too strong for the most
resolute resolver, though furnished for the assault. with all the weapons of philosophy. “He that endeavours to free himself from an ill habit (say's Baoon) must not change too much at a time, lest he should be discouraged by difficulty; nor too litile, for then he will make but slow advances.”
Idler, vol. I, p. 152. To advise a man unaccustomed to the eyes of the multitude, to inount a tribunal without perturbation; to tell him, whose life has passed in the shades of contemplation, that he must not be disconcerted or perplexed in receiving and returning
the compliments of a «plenrlid assembly, is to advise an inhabitant of Brazil or Sumatra not to shiver at an English winter, or him why has always lived upon a plain, to look from a precipice without emotion. It is to suppose custom instan. taneously controllable by reason, and to endeavour to communicate by precept, that which only time and habit can bestow.
Rambler, vol. 3, p. 317.
Life of Butler. CHARACTERS. In cities, and yet more in courts, the minute discriminations of character, which distinguish one man from another, are, for the most part, effaced. The peculiarities of temper and opinion are gradually worn away by promiscuous converse, as angular bodies and uneven surfaces lose their points and asperities by frequent attrition against one another, and approach by degrees to uniform rotundity. )
Rambler, vol. 3, p. 192. The opinions of every man must be learned from himself. . Concerning his practice it is safest to trust the evidence of others. Where those testimonies concur, no higher degree of certainty can be obtained of his character.
Life of Sir Thomas Browne, P. 286. To get a name can happen but to few. ,A name, even in the most commercial nation, is one of the few things which cannot be bought; it is the free gift of mankind, which must be