May probably suffer as, under The Chalking Act, known to be guilty. So much for the merits sublime (With whose catalogue ne'er should Of the three greatest lights of our time, As a matter of course, I agree Dr. Eady must go to the wall. But as S-they with laurels is crowned, With a swinging' Corona Muralis !” EPITAPH ON A TUFT-HUNTER. For here lies one who ne'er preferred A Viscount to a Marquis yet. Beside him place the God of Wit, And Love's own sister for an Earl's. Did niggard Fate no peers afford, He took, of course, to peer's rela And rather than not sport a lord, Even Irish names, could he but tag 'em With 'Lord' and 'Duke,' were sweet And, at a pinch, Lord Ballyraggum Heaven grant him now some noblenook, THE PETITION OF THE ORANGEMEN OF IRELAND. To the people of England, the humble Petition To keep us from murdering the other six parts; That, as to laws made for the good of the many, That much it delights every true Orange brother In discussing which sect most tormented the other, And burned with most gusto, some hundred years since ; 1 A crown granted as a reward among the Romans to persons who performed any extraor dinary exploits upon walls-such as scaling them, battering them, etc. No doubt, writing upon them, to the extent that Dr. Eady does, would equally establish a claim to the honour, That we love to behold, while Old England grows faint, Whether t'other saint, Dominic, burnt the devil's paw- That 'tis very well known this devout Irish nation One party in Trans, and the other in Con, That we, your petitioning Cons, have, in right That we trust to Peel, Eldon, and other such sages, Cut the throats of all Christians who stickled for ou.4 That, relying on England, whose kindness already That, as to the expense-the few millions, or so, 1 To such important discussions as these the greater part of Dr. Southey's Vindiciæ Ecclesiæ Anglicana is devoted. 2 Consubstantiation-the true reformed belief; at least the belief of Luther, and, as Mosheim asserts, of Melancthon also. 3 When John of Ragusa went to Constantinople (at the time this dispute between 'ex' and etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. 'per' was going on), he found the Turks, we are told, laughing at the Christians for being divided by two such insignificant particles." The Arian controversy.-Before that time, says Hooker, in order to be a sound believing Christian, men were not curious what syllables or particles of speech they used.' A VISION. BY THE AUTHOR OF CHRISTABEL. UP!' said the Spirit, and, ere I could pray One hasty orison, whirled me away One couldn't say whether 'twas day or night; And crossed by many a mazy track, One didn't know how to get on or back; And I felt like a needle that's going astray (With its one eye out) through a bundle of hay; When the Spirit he grinned, and whispered me, 'Thou'rt now in the Court of Chancery!' Around me flitted unnumbered swarms Of shapeless, bodiless, tailless forms; (Like bottled-up babes that grace the room Of that worthy knight, Sir Everard Home) All of them things half-killed in rearing; Some were lame-some wanted hearing; Some had through half-a-century run, Though they hadn't a leg to stand upon. Others, more merry, as just beginning, Around on a point of law were spinning; Or balanced aloft, 'twixt Bill and Answer, Lead at each end-like a tight-rope dancer. Some were so cross, that nothing could please 'em : Some gulped down affidavits to ease 'em; All were in motion, yet never a one, Let it move as it might, could ever move So harsh on my ear that wailing fell Of the wretches who in this Limbo dwell! It seemed like the dismal symphony Of the shapes Æneas in hell did see; Or those frogs, whose legs a barbarous cook Cut off, and left the frogs in the brook, To cry all night, till life's last dregs, Give us our legs!-give us our legs! Touched with this sad and sorrowful scene, I asked what all this yell might mean? When the Spirit replied, with a grin of glee, "Tis the cry of the suitors in Chancery!' I looked, and I saw a wizard rise, With a wig like a cloud before men's eyes. In his agèd hand he held a wand, Wherewith he beckoned his embryo band, And they moved, and moved, as he waved it o'er, But they never got on one inch the Amazed and posed, I was just about To ask his name, when the screams without, The merciless clack of the imps within, And that conjuror's mutterings, made such a din, That, startled, I woke-leaped up in my bed Found the Spirit, the imps, and the conjuror fled, And blessed my stars, right pleased to see That I wasn't as yet in Chancery. NEWS FOR COUNTRY COUSINS. DEAR Coz, as I know neither you nor Miss Draper, As to Greece and Lord Cochrane, things couldn't look better- Engaging to change the old name, if he can, From the Knights of St. John to the Knights of St. Dan- From Russia the last accounts are, that the Czar- And whose first princely act (as you know, I suppose) The late Emperor's night-caps, and thinks of bestowing On all the distinguished old ladies now going. (While I write an arrival from Riga-'the Brothers'— Last advices from India-Sir Archy, 'tis thought, 'This Potentate styles himself the Monarch of the Golden Foot. And engages (lest Gold-foot should give us leg bail, As he did once before) to pay down on the nail. This is all for the present-what vile pens and paper! Yours truly, dear Cousin-best love to Miss Draper. AN INCANTATION. SUNG BY THE BUBBLE SPIRIT. AIR- Come with me, and we will go Mix the lather, Johnny W-lks, Thou who rhym'st so well to 'bilks :' Great M.P. for Sudsbury! Others, as if lent a ray From the streaming Milky Way, Now's the moment-who shall first John W-lks, junior, runs beside ye, Gaping for the froth to fall But, hark, my time is out- [Here the stage darkens-a discordant crash is heard from the orchestra-the broken bubbles descend in a saponaceous but uncleanly mist over the heads of the Dramatis Persona, and the scene drops, leaving the bubble-hunters-all in the suds.] |